I) then
how we built our castles
on sighs, on moans,
on galloping pulse
on warm breath, on sweat
on flying notes of laughter
skimming undulations
through hot moist passageways
we built our castles
on a bubble of ether
II) now
lips pout less for kisses
more in disapproval
the tongue pierces less to seek
more to blame
eyes don't look into
don't look at, don't look for
in the fast fading light
the bubble of ether glints and
a wink later, castle no more
III) forever
lets start again
build the foundation
to build our castle on
the acres in fragments
some mine some yours
build bridges
bring them together
to share common ground
to build on.
© 2008 Padmavani Karkera
edited extensively on 07.03.2011(there is not much left of the original)
love the whole concepts of building common ground..
ReplyDeletestunning imagery...
A++
:)
This is fantastic. I love what you have created here..a yesterday, today and a hopeful tomorrow!
ReplyDeleteGreat ! loved the way the three parts merged so well to form a whole. building bridges and covering the differences. loved it.
ReplyDeleteThank you Jingle, Honeyhaiku and butterflies of time! Thank you for dropping and letting me know.
ReplyDeleteCheers
Padmavani
Lovely poem! You've made a very nice build-up through images of yesterday and today for a better tomorrow. I like the hope for tomorrow and the message that we choose.
ReplyDeleteWoww.. this is simply too good, Padmavani!! You have perfectly captured a snapshot in time of many a relationship... ahhh.. that bumpy ride!! :)
ReplyDeleteSuperbly written, my dear..
May the hopeful tomorrow give rise to more better todays and yesterdays...
Cheers!
Shari and Kavitha
ReplyDeleteThank you very much!
Cheers
Padmavani
Greetings!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the lovely contribution to potluck on week 25,
week 26 is open NOW, we treasury your poetry
and welcome you in in your personal convenience…old poems are welcome!
xoxox