![]() |
Image Courtesy: Lara604 |
threadbare curtains hang heavy
directing fiery gold dust motes
on to gogh's dreary sunflowers.
on the window sill the *bulbul
whistles out to her lover
whose legs stick out of the cat's mouth.
sunshine is heat; breeze is cold
bread is mouldy and wine, vinegar
silence is strident
the bed is lumpy and cold on the left
the ceiling is a black hole
the crickets are a racket
in the bath the showerhead beckons
cold water wash away hot tears
i hear the cuckoo mourn
sorrow nests in my chest no more
the emptiness is fast filling up
like clothes into my little suitcase
i leave on my bicycle
kicking my legs up in the air
raising dust behind me
i pass by the flowers on your grave
they wave prettily, they are not my doing
she did love you more
in the chill morning breeze, i speed downhill
chasing a giant mug of hot masala tea
and curls of rich yellow butter melting on crisp warm toast
© 2006 Padmavani Karkera
Revised extensively 17 August 2011
* Bulbul is a song bird http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-whiskered_Bulbul
* Bulbul is a song bird http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-whiskered_Bulbul
So much feeling conveyed through these images. Well done.
ReplyDeleteVery powerful imagery, Padma. Loved it.
ReplyDeleteThis appears to be about a broken relationship, a love relationship, that the person is devastated by at first, but eventually recovers from. I love the rich images throughout, although I'm not quite sure what the second stanza means (bulbul?)I particularly like: 'the emptiness is fast filling up like clothes in my little suitcase.' So neat and tidy! Also 'curls of rich yellow butter melting on crisp warm toast.' Absolutely delightful! I like it when a poem tells a story, and this you have done beautifully here.
ReplyDeleteThank you Joanne and Corrine! Glad you liked the poem :)
ReplyDeleteHello Elizabeth! Thank you! Bulbul is a song bird. I have provided a link for those who may be unfamiliar. Thanks for letting me know.
Cheers
Very powerful imagery, Padma. Loved it!
ReplyDeleteVery vivid....beautiful.
ReplyDeleteThis poem is lovely, Padmavani! I enjoyed reading it! :-)
ReplyDeleteread it three times...a wonderful poem padmavani with such a lot of things going on, so spiked with different emotions, from the cold feeling of loss to the lines "she loved you more" to the warm tea and buttered toast..great balance and pictures in this
ReplyDeletethis is finely layered...the opening evokes feeling and then you explain it well in your story...she loced you more...that line pops...then you desire for brighter days...new food for the journey...
ReplyDeleteReally wonderful imagery in this piece, sends the reader delving in from start to finish, nicely done.
ReplyDeleteI can feel the wind in my hair as I peddle, smell the scents in the air as I fly by...this was a wonderfully paced write laced throughout with equally fantastic imagery...I'm still listening to the song bird!
ReplyDeleteWhat a capture of that desolated emptiness where everything is meaningless or irritating or vile, that is part of loss, then the slow transition to feeling again. An excellent poem, full of the knowledge of the heart, as always here.
ReplyDeleteI love the images in your poem...full of sadness and melancholy....
ReplyDeletethe ending verses are lovely:
in the chill morning breeze, i speed downhill
chasing a giant mug of hot masala tea
and curls of rich yellow butter melting on crisp warm toast
Hello.
ReplyDeleteVivid imagery, Padmavani.
I found this particularly sad: "i pass by the flowers on your grave
they wave prettily, they are not my doing
she did love you more".
Nicely done!
Evocative imagery and brilliant observation make this a rich and rewarding read.
ReplyDeleteI like the part about the little suitcase and the bicycle a lot. Well, I like the whole poem.
ReplyDeleteVery original and deep.
So wonderful and powerful. Good deep thoughts.
ReplyDeleteI completely understood this piece. Your writing has such immediacy, and color. Through them and through your movement in the poem, you give emotional weight and layering to your piece. Very well done, here. I enjoyed it very much. G.
ReplyDeleteThat was a very moving one, Padma..
ReplyDeleteSuch deep feelings and and strong emotions put forth in a beautiful manner.. gave me goosebumps really!
I guess one needs to find solace in nature, despite her unfair ways..
Thank you all very much!!! I appreciate your visiting and letting me know...truly.
ReplyDeletePadmavani
I love your use of imagery. The way you weave them to express you pain. "The bed is cold and lumpy on the left"...that pained my heart. Beautiful.
ReplyDeletehttp://rimlybezbaruah.blogspot.com/2011/08/five-people-you-meet-in-heaven.html
fantastic.
ReplyDeleteGreetings, Glad to Meet!
We are starting a poetry community at a Garden Setting, our week 1 writing theme is
“Adam and Eve” ,
Please check out our site and prepare to participate, 1 to 3 poems are welcome!
The Poetry Picnic is open Sunday, 8pm, American Central Time!
Hope to see you share your delicious poetry with us.
Bless your weekend!
xoxox
lovely words...beautifully crafted poignant lines!
ReplyDelete